Written submission from a member of the public (SPP0089)

How widespread is harassment in public places?

Sexual street harassment is extremely prevalent in public places.  I feel like I experience this every day, but for the sake of facts it probably happens a minimum of three to seven days a week.

Who are the perpetrators and victims, how does it happen?

The perpetrators I've encountered are as young as 10 years and as old as 59.  My first memory of street harassment was when I was [under 18] years old and it hasn't stopped since.  I am now [25-34] years old.  I have lived in the suburbs of [location], [location], [location], and now [location].  I have long brown hair, an athletic curvy build, and I have trendy fashion.  However, I equally value modesty. I show minimal cleavage and my skirts/dresses don't go above my mid-thigh.  Does modest fashion mean I get harassed less? No!  Men have honked and cat called me from their cars when I'm covered head to toe in winter apparel.  I get honked at a lot, and I know they are honking at me because they are the only car on the road.  One time a driver stared at me so intently that I feared he would pull over ahead of my route and try to abduct me.

Another time I was walking home from [location] station and a group of 3 white British men about 20-23 years old linked arms and blocked my path so I couldn't get past them.  I tried to step into the street to walk around them but one of the men said I didn't want to do that.  Since I never looked behind me (to prevent compromising my defenses), I would have stepped blindly into the street just to avoid them.  When the man told me I shouldn't step into the street, I figured a car was coming and so I stayed on the sidewalk.  I threatened them by saying they didn't want to do this.  I felt like that statement instilled doubt in their mind about my own capabilities and how it could affect them. The let me pass after about 2 minutes, untouched.  It was a long two minutes and nobody was on the street except us.

Another time I was walking out of the station and a group of white British boys ages 10-13 shouted to me, "Hey sexy! Bend over for me!" There was one adult in the group and he looked powerless in the group of boys, he didn't even say one word of objection.  I threatened to call the police and the boy asked why.  I responded, "Because what you're doing is called sexual harassment!"  The big shocker is that a middle aged woman walked in between the group and I while I shouted it, and she never interjected.

I work in the [location] mall and men frequently approach me.  One man stopped me and said, "I followed you for about 25 feet and wanted to tell you that you are pretty.  How are you?" I said, "Sorry, but I don't talk to strangers," turned around and left.  He continued talking and asked, "Is that an accent?" as if he never even heard my words or registered the body language of me walking away. This man was probably in his 20s and was from an unknown European country.

Another time in [location] I was standing by the escalator waiting for my husband and a man started talking to me.  I had my earbuds in so I couldn't hear what he said.  He told me to take out my earbuds and when I didn't, he reached his hand toward my ear to remove it himself.  I shouted, "What!? I can hear you!" Although his response was too quiet for me to actually hear him.  I didn't feel comfortable saying my line about not talking to strangers because I felt it would be a jerk-move, and I honestly don't remember what I rambled to make him go away but my body language went from resting bitch face and then to a straight up pissed off scowl.  That man was probably 27-35 years old from a country along the Europe/Asia border.   When my husband came, I told him that he should have told me he was going to be late meeting me by the escalator because there are better places for me to wait.  He asked where and I said, "In the food court, sitting on a bar stool of [venue] facing the wall where no one can see me!" I got frustrated because I realized that a woman standing by herself in a public place is interpreted as an invitation for approach, but it doesn't mean the same for a man standing by himself.  Gender inequality.  I started crying to my husband and said that I wished I was a man.

Other times in [location], groups of about 3-4 black males, ages 17-22, will actually turn 180 degrees to look at women's bums.  I see this every day.  One time I even saw a man clicking his tongue for a woman's attention.  It sounded like he was trying to beckon a horse.

I went to [venue] in [location] once and there were men lined up standing on the perimeter watching the dance floor as is they were at a strip club.  I maintained high alertness and awareness and also kept my backside toward my girlfriends.  Salsa clubs are also sterotypically known for having creeps (Hispanic males aged 25-60) on the perimeter just staring at the women on the dance floor.

I feel like the only thing connected with my street harassment (approach and honking) is my walking by myself.  Inappropriate stares occur regardless of whom I am with.

What is the impact of the harassment?

It took me weeks before I was able to calmly walk down the sidewalk after the 3 men cornered me.  I panicked each time a man or group of males walked on the same sidewalk as me.  I had several therapy sessions talking about it.  Then after the boys told me to bend over, I had to call in sick from work because I was too anxious to leave my house.  The following week, I went to work, but no where else besides work/home.

After the earbud incident, I felt violated because the man approached me when I didn't want to be approached, and then reached his hand into my personal space, and invaded my privacy.  And even when I barked at him, he didn't piss off.  How many ways do I have to tell you that your presence is unwanted?

I also have PTSD from childhood sexual abuse and abusive high school relationships, so when street harassment occurs, it worsens my existing PTSD.

I can only imagine how an 11 year old girl would feel if her classmates told her, "Hey sexy, bend over for me!" Pre-teens have a hard enough time trying to find social acceptance and develop their self-image and street harassment can impact that process.

How do men and boys learn what is acceptable behavior?

This should be talked about in the home, but since that is unreliable, schools should address this issue starting at age 10.  It would be ideal to have more support from the government.  My husband didn't realize how frequent sexual street harassment is until I started telling him about it.  Now he's gained more awareness and even witnessed men cat-calling women and turning 180 degrees, whereas he never noticed its prevalence beforehand.

How should the government tackle this?

I wondered what the police would have said if I had actually called them to report the group of boys who told me to bend over.  I think they would dismiss it because they were unlikely to cause physical harm to me.  I think they would have empathized with my concern if I reported the 3 men cornering me, but what could they have done to help me?

The government needs to fund education programs to stop street harassment.  Programs could include education about acknowledging nonverbal cues, like my angry scowl.  Also, topics should teach that the street is not an appropriate place to "pick up" women.  I also think a poster saying, "Harassing women does not prove our masculinity." But I think some men don't realize they're harassing us and think that they're complimenting us or that we enjoy it.  That's where non-verbal communication can support verbal communication.

I recently saw a TV advert saying that if sexual harassment happens on a crowded tube, that it can be reported and the perpetrator would be held accountable.  I reallllllly liked that!

Who besides the police has a role in improving this?

I was furious with Paperchase for their external marketing posters for Valentines Day 2018.  The animated graphic targeted children, but the caption said, "Hey cutie, nice booty." I am not bothered that the greeting card exists because there is an appropriate time and place for that slogan, but it should not be on the external windows.  This translates to the fact that their message is reaching second graders who aren't even entering the store.  That exposes children to negative objectification that they may find humorous.  Imagine how many 10 year old are now adding "Hey cutie, nice booty" to their "bend over for me." Also, since they're greeting the recipient, "Hey [cutie]" it means that they're initiating the conversation....... aka that's their opening line.... aka harassment.

The general public has a duty to raise their voice if they see a contributor to a societal issue.  I raised my voice by emailing Paperchase about their campaign.

Step one is to verbally acknowledge the issue, step two is to take DO something about the issue.

Existing laws need to be better understood and shared, because I have no idea what they currently are. I read that Scotland is making some new laws, and I think England should match and even surpass their laws.

March 2018